Today’s blog was going to be about other stuff… but I just heard some shocking and upsetting news and would like to dedicate this blogpost to my friend who passed away last night… apparently spent 36 hours in a lot of pain, doctors tried everything but the pain was too much and she went to sleep. She was one the loveliest girls I knew…a fighter, with courage and determination that was admirable…and a gentle heart.
The saddest part is that for years people called her an attention seeker. Even the doctors didn’t believe there was anything wrong. She’d come into school with mouth ulcers, and double over in pain, and would cry her eyes out. How was it attention seeking? So many turned their backs, even when she was finally diagnosed.
Surprisingly she didn’t feel bitter towards any who left her or called her a liar. She said to me once “they just don’t understand. If they can’t see something physically wrong, right there in their face, then they don’t believe. It’s like ghosts; you’ve got to see it to believe. They can’t see the pain I’m in, therefore to them it’s not real. I get it.”
And it’s so true. She’d point out my depression and apply the same logic and reason. No matter how hard I cried or yelled about the pain I was in, there were always people who’d disbelieve me. The moment I was physically hurt, they all listened.
Why don’t we listen to silent illnesses? Behcet’s disease, fibromyalgia, depression, anxiety, PTSD, arthritis, diabetes… we all see someone with a cold and offer sympathy, or someone with a broken leg. If someone tells you that they’re depressed, how many walk away? Fibromyalgia is still being nick-named the “attention seeking illness.” I’ve seen people suffer with it…it’s a horrible illness. Nobody listened to my friend. Now everyone’s listening and she’s not here to see.
RIP sweetie…I’m so glad you’re not in pain now…so sorry I hadn’t spoken to you in a while…and so proud to have known such a courageous and kind young woman.