So my inner child had decided to show herself…

I’ll be honest. I never fully understood this “inner child” talk. I kept getting told I needed to contact my inner child more, and listen to her. But my inner child is me? How do I contact…me? I know the memories, I’ve had a hug. Surely that’s it? I often just nodded my understanding…but didn’t know how to. Nobody could tell me the technique. It’s like people who can roll their tongues. They can’t actually tell you how they do it; they just can.

Nobody could really tell me how to properly connect with my inner child. I just hoped one day it’d happen.

It has. Took an hour of therapy for me to realise that I have, but I nonetheless have. A random OCD freakout actually, it turns out, was my inner child having an emotional flashback…which is why I needed soothing more than what felt reasonable. I was very embarrassed at how upset I was. But they weren’t my tears, they were my inner child’s. By allowing myself to start psychotherapy, I have given my inner child permission to show how she’s feeling. She doesn’t know the abuse has stopped. She’s very scared, very sad, and pretty lonely too. I’ve never noticed…and that makes me kinda sad 😦

Therapist gave me some handy tips on how to soothe her more; hot chocolate rather than cups of tea, reading children’s books, cuddling teddies etc. I still don’t know how to simply communicate with he; it appears I can only understand her (and even then, not properly) when she’s having a freakout. But apparently this communication will improve over time.

It’s weird. Does anyone have any tips/advice on how to communicate with/cope with the inner child? I’m well aware she carries all the emotions I’ve so carefully bottled…and I’m scared of how much this is going to hurt. I want them; I want to recover. But I have no idea what I’m letting myself in for here…

Any advice would be much appreciated!

J

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3 thoughts on “So my inner child had decided to show herself…

  1. I thought about this for a while before answering. I have had trouble with this inner child stuff, too – how I’m supposed to hug her and love her and tell her it’s okay.
    In one of my therapy sessions, I set up a mental “board of directors”. These are aspects of my personality that I personify as individuals – the critic, the sex goddess, the rebel, the spiritual guru, the capapble man, and my little girl. I’m the chairman of the board. My little girl self sits between the ultra-capable and stoic man, and the ever ready to open her mouth critic. Sometimes she needs the protection of the male figure, sometimes the protection of the bossy in-your-face critic.
    So I let other aspects of ‘me’ nurture her because I’m not always comfortable doing that.
    BTW, I don’t suffer from DID, just have a really vivid imagination.

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