What is ritual abuse?

I am a survivor of ritual abuse, but I realise not many people understand what it is. Generally speaking I don’t like different labels for abuse (ritualistic, sexual, physical, emotional etc etc) – it hurts and damages regardless of the name. But there are important aspects to each, and things people should know…

Rather than me try to explain it myself, I’ve found two extremely useful websites which sum it up. Not everything applies to me – some bits I didn’t endure, some things I endured but aren’t on the websites, some seem a bit of a conspiracy theory which even I am skeptical about… but the basics of what the victims go through is something I have experienced first hand. My abuse was less satanic focussed, but there were certainly elements. I urge everyone to read it: you will not only learn what it involves (without graphic detail) you will also understand the mindset of a survivor, such as myself, and how to help them… I feel extremely alone in my recovery from this, because it’s still a topic which is largely kept quiet…


If there are any other survivors out there, I’d love to hear from you! I realise it’s frightening to say so publicly, but if you want to and can do then feel free to email me. J


14 thoughts on “What is ritual abuse?

  1. Thank you for the links. I am currently working as a bookkeeper at a mental health counseling practice. The practitioners specialize in DID and trauma. I forwarded the links to them in hopes they will prove helpful.

  2. Thank you for these links, and thank you for having the courage to share your horrific experiences. I know that my tears can’t help you, but your courage could well help others seek out help.

  3. Me too. It’s only one part of what I lived through, and I actually don’t understand it very well. But I am right there with you. Take care and much love.

    • Thank you for this…glad to know neither of us are alone. I don’t understand how people could do that, but I’ve decided to not try and understand. I don’t actually want to know what goes on in their heads…
      Take care, stay strong… J x

      • It may not be necessary to understand what was in their heads so much as what was in your head. For me, the ritual abuse was at home. My dad was pretty clearly a psychopath and just enjoyed torturing people and getting them to do things that were usually considered morally wrong. My mom was just more just ill, and I think the ritual aspect made it all somehow more appealing to her–as if it made things less wrong–as well as more exciting. And she loved excitement and drama. But involving the supernatural can be a very effective way of scaring people into doing what you want.

        I was raised in a religious cult that wasn’t directly involved in the abuse and wasn’t aware of it. It meant there was really nowhere for me to turn. They would never believe these people who went to church 3 times a week were doing these things behind closed doors. And they also had us convinced that no one else could be trusted or could ever care about us.

      • I’m really so sorry you went through that and couldn’t turn to anyone 😦 So amazing that you can speak about it now though; shows how strong you are…

      • Thank you.

        It’s also practice. Every time you do a scary thing, it gets a little bit less scary. My blog has helped more than I could ever guess.

        Take care.

  4. I am beginning to acknowledge some history of ritual abuse in my life. Up until this week, I have only acknowledged it as nightmares, but all signs point to it. It is awful. I understand the DID stuff. Though it ended very early in my life, it still had a lasting impact. I am just begining to sort through the ramifications. Thank you for your honesty.

    • Hey, I’m so terribly sorry… it really is awful. I hope you can seek comfort somehow, in some way, by knowing you’re not alone. It may well feel all black and horrific sometimes but try and find the glimmers of light – it’s those glimmers which give us weapons far more powerful than the abusers. I wish you well on your recovery, but remember – you survived the real thing. You can survive the aftermath too. I have to remind myself of that sometimes. Take good care…. x

  5. I am not a ra-survivor myself, but the reason I found your blog is that I have a friend who is. For her it was both cult stuff but also mk-ultra/project monarch ritual abuse and programming. She struggles a lot and has a big and complex system that I have been allowed to meet parts of and to support her and the others inside. I am so sorry this happened to you. I am no did or (s)ra expert by any means but getting to know my friend I have read litteraly hundreds of blogs, articles and a few books to educate myself and if you ever need another ear you are more than welcome to e-mail me. I wont judge and I will believe what you have to say, even though I cant offer first hand knowing what you guys went through. Sending love and safe hugs if wanted

    • I’m so sorry to hear about your friend but also relieved to hear she has such a supportive friend as yourself, willing to learn about such dark corners of the world in effort to help her. As a survivor, thank you. The only way this madness can stop is if we are listened to and believed.
      And thank you for your kind offer, I truly appreciate it. Our system is also big and complex but so far we just about seem to have a safe control over it 🙂

      • Yes, I can imagine it would be given what you all had to survive. I am in constant awe of the human mind and how it can protect us.
        Thank you for your kind words, but its really I who should say thank you to all ra survivors who opened my eyes and let me walk beside you on your journey. I love my friend very much and she, just like you, is an amazing person and they are an amazing system just like yours. I just saw the post with you did family tree and that was so awesome! I hope you can find safety and Numbers and maybe you and your littles can cuddle and sing and laugh like you wish you could with the other children.

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